And now, a word from our sponsor:

"Honey, you look terrible!"
"Ugh... I FEEL terrible."
"You've been at the dog treats again, haven't you?"
"But they're so crunchy... and meaty..."
"This is horrible! What are we to do?"
"...they're shaped like fun dog things..."
"You've lost your job! The house is being reposessed!"
"...some of them taste like bacon..."
"Honey! PLEASE! Get your hand out of that box and speak to me! PLEASE!! For once please GET SOME HELP!!"
"...and they make their own gravy, too!"
"*uncontrollable sobbing*"

Another household torn in two, screaming and sobbing like the pathetic wretches they are, by pupperia, the human addiction to dog snacks. Studies show that 2 out of every 23 families are afflicted by this mindless tragedy. It starts with some kibble and could end up costing you your life. What can you do? What can anybody do?

We here at the Western Massachusetts Pupperia Institute have the solution. Our treatment programs are safe, economical, and effective - with proven results. We don't just deal with the problem... we deal with the person, too. With honest facts and cold, hard caring. In six to eight weeks the afflicted is back on his or her feet again, ready to make a fresh, new start on life, one without dog treats.

"Honey, you look wonderful!"
"I feel wonderful too, dear!"
"Thanks to the Western Mass. Pupperia Institute."
"No more dog treats for me, dear."
"That's teriffic!"
"No, now it's only plain ol' Whiskas... *wink* Just kidding!"
"Ha ha ha!"

WMPI. Call us at 1-800-SNAUSAGES. Do it now before it's too late.

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